Parenting 101

I can remember as a young child (7-10 years) that when I got into trouble and was grounded as punishment, I would get very angry.   Of course, over time I created a list of things I would and wouldn’t do when I became a father.   As I grew older (before 21), I also began to think about the challenges of raising children and that raising one child would certainly be easier than half a dozen;  that a boy would be easier than a girl; and that we all had lots of time to raise the best child.

These preconceived notions were with me until I met my wife.

I was a bachelor for some time and led a very independent, sometimes reckless and free lifestyle.   When I got married, a switch went on (or off) – suddenly, I had to be responsible.    It was important to fasten my seat belt when  I drove under the speed limit and couldn’t go out drinking all night long.    I was also going to be the best provider, so work was very important to support my family.

These are basic ideas that I am sure most people realize when they become parents, but I can’t be sure.  However it is my perception that a good majority of parents change (for the better).

Being a parent is wonderful and yet it is something some people don’t realize has a limited time span (I was one of them).   Everyday you are busy, trying to take care of the chores, run a business or make money to pay the bills and put food on the table.  Vacations are great to get away, but are over before they start.    Before you know it, your kids are all grown up and off to college, married and raising a family of their own.

I’ve learned that parenting is not about being right or wrong or being the best (really?).   It’s about being there for them, supporting them, loving them, caring about them, especially when your son or daughter needs you (and when they don’t).   It’s knowing that sometimes you can’t be at every basketball, football, soccer, volleyball, hockey game or practice, but letting them know they can enjoy life.   Its about showing them you support what they do.

I used to tell my step-son when he left for school that he should Listen, Learn, Remember, and most importantly Have Fun!   I think he did a great job at following this advice, for the most part.    He is a young man now and my wife and I are very proud of him.   As to my preconceived notions about raising children, I can safely say that it depends on the situation.   For us, we had the BEST kid and certainly my wife can attest to that, but just for the record, we may be a bit biased.

Time slips by too fast and some memories fade.   Take pictures along the way and share the moments with laughter and joy.   Parenting is by far the best thing any of us get to do in our lives.